Yikes!

I've found a small house that would suit our needs very well. I talked to the bank and have been approved for the mortgage. The next step is to make an offer, and all of a sudden I'm scared sh!tless! I don't know if it's my Dad's influence, "Never buy anything on credit! Never pay interest!". I'm sure at one point he qualified that for himself with "if you don't have to.", because he had a mortgage at one point too.

I'm all by myself in this venture though. I think that I know I can do it. I've run the numbers through a spreadsheet. Income vs. Expenses. The numbers do not lie. There will be money left at the end of the month. I know that 100%. The bank won't loan money if you can't handle it financially.

I'm a good saver. I'm a frugal person. I'm NOT a spender. I think I can, I think I can. A home of our own can only mean good things for Logan and I. And yet I'm hesitant.

But the little voice in my head is saying "No, not just yet". So who do I listen to - everyone else, or myself? I need someone bigger than me to tell me to go for it. Jump in with both feet. But - I'm all on my own on this one. Every time someone suggests to me that I should just go for it, I want to yell at them and tell them it's my decision to make and I'll make it when I'm ready. I know they mean well, really I do. I think I have Gwen to thank for this stubborn streak - but really, I want to do things MY way, not anyone else's. That way, if it all works out, I get ALL the credit.

I haven't made too many bad decisions in my lifetime - I don't think. I hope I make the right one this time. Yikes! Is it bad to want to cross my fingers that **I** make the right decision?